Hurray for partners!

A place for anyone who is supporting a breastfeeding mother - partners, siblings, friends, in laws, parents, etc.

Hurray for partners!

Postby LiamsMamma » Tue Jun 28, 2011 12:53 pm

I wrote this for something else, but thought I might share it on here too, and say "yay!" for our partners who support us!

Something not many people know, and even less people probably expect of me, is that when Liam was 4 weeks old, I gave up on breastfeeding. I was dreading every feed, dreading the pain of him attaching and the pain of my letdown. One night at 2am, I decided I had had enough. I couldn't do it, and resigned myself to being one of those people who couldn't breastfeed. Lucky for me, Matt happened to come downstairs and see how distressed I was at trying to feed Liam. He was crying, I was crying, he was trying to attach then crying and screaming, and I didn't know what the problem was, I knew I had milk there, so clearly my milk was bad. It is a story I am sure there are many people can relate too, and in many circumstances it would have probably been the cue for the partner to say "it's ok, you've tried your best, go have a cry I'll make up his bottle and give it to him", and in all honesty, that's really what I thought I wanted him to do at the time. Instead, he could see how distressed I was, could see how it was affecting Liam, and he took him off me, told me to go have my cry/have a shower/do whatever I needed to do, and come back when I was ready. He then spent the next 20 - 30 minutes rocking Liam, singing to him, generally calming him down, while I went and mourned the end of our breastfeeding relationship. I calmed down, discovered he had settled Liam without needing a bottle, and we then went on to have our first pain-free feed in 4 whole weeks


Thank you DH, without you I'd have never made it past 4 weeks, let alone to 12 months.
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Postby Capricious » Tue Jun 28, 2011 12:59 pm

Oh LM, that's beautiful! And go Matt! :-D

I read or heard somewhere that if you have a supportive partner, you are something like 70x more likely to continue breastfeeding. Stories like yours really confirm that for me. :smt049
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Postby mooki » Tue Jun 28, 2011 1:45 pm

thats beautiful

a big :smt023 to supportive partners :-D
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Postby Andypandy » Tue Jun 28, 2011 2:31 pm

:smt060 Beautiful.
DS1: May 09 Breastfed 2y7m
DS2: Oct 2012 Breastfed 2y1m I am pretending he is weaned
DD: Feb 2015
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Postby foggylog » Tue Jun 28, 2011 9:18 pm

YAY, mine helped me to keep going too with E :-D
I was storked by the lovely ESTHER :)
E = DD may 09 BF til 15.5mths
O = DS Dec 10, BFing
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Postby Monicat » Tue Jun 28, 2011 9:29 pm

What a sweetie :)
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Postby Ezekielsmummy » Wed Jun 29, 2011 8:23 pm

what a wonderful partner you have!!!
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DS1, 3 Angels & Precious Matthew with us for only a short time & left me with a heart full of love & ocean full of tears!
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Postby strolltotheshops » Wed Jun 29, 2011 8:40 pm

What a fantastic partner.
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Postby LiamsMamma » Thu Jun 30, 2011 7:08 am

Yep, he is quite wonderful, definitely would not have been breastfeeding without him. :smt055 Probably helps that when he was 9 his mum fed twins for a year so he was very exposed to it when he was younger! And of course there is just the fact that he is awesome :D
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Postby Silje » Thu Jun 30, 2011 7:37 am

That is so beautiful! :smt049

My DH always said that he thought 1 year would be enough. When we got to 15 months and DD obviously wanted to stop, he said 'aww is it over already? Sure you shouldn't try longer?'

I thought that was awesome!
DD feb 2010
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Postby Zoe'sMum » Thu Jun 30, 2011 7:52 pm

Yeah for supportive partners. :lol:
Z born 18.10.08
H born 13.12.10
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Postby livcat » Fri Jul 01, 2011 11:07 am

I say yay too! Mine has always been of the opinion that bf fixes everything so if he can't figure out what is upsetting them and he's changed the nappy he passes them to me :lol: In the very early days he suggested we have formula sachets in the house in case of emergency (like if I had to be taken to hospital in an ambulance or something - he's a worrier by nature), but he never ever suggested feeding formula to them. If I was stressed out he would take them away so I could have a break. :smt055
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Postby Bubbly Breastfeeder » Tue Jul 05, 2011 6:19 pm

Wow you're so lucky, I wish my partner was like that I honestly feel like a single parent and it sucks. especially when you need someone to lean on and understand like your partner did.

I was lucky that he even poped into the hospital because work is always more important than us.

I've tried talking to him and he just doesn't understand I'm just told I'm ungrateful and that I put tupid ideas in my head.

So I guess I just have to accept that I'm pretty much a single parent that has one small child and one large one to look after.

So depressing wish things were different, especially since my dad was like that- work always more important than us.
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