Weddings and family - final update and

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wilfred
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Re: Weddings and family - UPDATED

Post by wilfred » Mon Jul 21, 2014 3:40 pm

One word... Bridezilla! :twisted:
Me: 38
DH: 38
DS1: 11.5 bf for 6 weeks
DD1: 8.5 bf for 13 weeks
DS2: 6.5 bf for 26 months
DD2: 4 bf for 3 yrs and 2 weeks

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Baby Blue Eyes
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Re: Weddings and family - UPDATED

Post by Baby Blue Eyes » Tue Jul 22, 2014 7:43 pm

Little Tiggermum wrote:
breastfeedingisnormal wrote:
Baby Blue Eyes wrote:Oh did I mention the ceremony is on a public beach :lol:
Oh, you sooo need to go to that beach on that day, wedding or no wedding. Kids, sunscreen, buckets, blankets, get right into it. Wild horsed wouldn't keep me from that party. I'll bring the popcorn :twisted:
totally agree... do you want me to bring the somberos and sunnies?
hmmm its a bit cold down here... did you say you needed babysitters for the ceremony?? I can build sandcastles and scream and squeal with the best of them. :smt006 :smt004

you are welcome to join us.

Sent an email of regret that dh will not be joining me for the ceremony.
DS1 - b/f 4 yrs
DS2 - b/f 3yrs 11mths
DS3 - B/F 4yrs 10 mths
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dellywatts
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Re: Weddings and family - UPDATED

Post by dellywatts » Thu Jul 24, 2014 9:23 am

I just caught up on all this. I must say I admire how calm and pleasant you have been through all of this. All your communications sound respectful. I think I would've gone off quite some time ago!
DD1 ~ 9/2007
DS ~ 2/2009 bf for just over 4 yrs
DD2 ~ 3/2011 bf for nearly 2 yrs
DD3 ~ 12/2013 bfing

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Baby Blue Eyes
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Re: Weddings and family - UPDATED

Post by Baby Blue Eyes » Mon Jul 28, 2014 7:46 pm

dellywatts wrote:I just caught up on all this. I must say I admire how calm and pleasant you have been through all of this. All your communications sound respectful. I think I would've gone off quite some time ago!
trust me I cried and raged to my poor friends and dh about it.

no response and I don't expect one
DS1 - b/f 4 yrs
DS2 - b/f 3yrs 11mths
DS3 - B/F 4yrs 10 mths
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Baby Blue Eyes
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Re: Weddings and family - UPDATED

Post by Baby Blue Eyes » Wed Jul 30, 2014 8:36 pm

I have him sending me demanding texts and emails asking why I have defriended him from facebook.

I have to admit I'm shaking because I'm scared of the emotional abuse that will be coming. I already have had 1 email and 2 texts, demanding an answer
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Mummy woo!
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Re: Weddings and family - UPDATED Again

Post by Mummy woo! » Wed Jul 30, 2014 9:14 pm

I thought you couldn't tell when people defriended you?
Hugs BBE - this is all just ridiculous and mean and petty all at once.
It's OK Pluto, I'm not a planet either

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Baby Blue Eyes
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Re: Weddings and family - UPDATED Again

Post by Baby Blue Eyes » Wed Jul 30, 2014 9:23 pm

They don't unless they go looking at their friends list. Just got another email asking why I'm avoiding him basically because I don't want to deal with it right now and want to sleep on it so I'm more calmer. Just had a cry on a friends virtual shoulder and not freaking out as much.

I don't think me saying I'm not interested in you knowing my life on facebook since you don't want to know me IRL would go down well
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mummymanda
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Re: Weddings and family - UPDATED Again

Post by mummymanda » Thu Jul 31, 2014 9:57 am

Do you and he have any mutual friends? could you block him and say you deactivated as you need a break so its not just "him"

Big hugs yes its all very petty. Why can't he just appreciate that you have worked out a solution to attend the ceremony. I hope the fall out is not too bad and he mellows on the honeymoon
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Yankee
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Re: Weddings and family - UPDATED Again

Post by Yankee » Thu Jul 31, 2014 10:29 am

If you block him (a step up from defriending) that means he can't see anything you post. However that could backfire even more if he hears through the grapevine that you're still on Facebook.

Big hugs hon!
DD born September 2013

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Baby Blue Eyes
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Re: Weddings and family - UPDATED Again

Post by Baby Blue Eyes » Thu Jul 31, 2014 10:21 pm

you seriously have to be the most condescending, hypocritical, arrogant, ignorant, self absorbed / self centered, sookish& fake person I know!!!! Seriously why is everything About YOU!!!! F*&n serious, you f^*&ing hypocrite. YOU TOLD ME " don't let anyone dictate your wedding" And you're the first HYPOCRITE to dictate mine and tanya's wedding on what you want!! Then you proceed to cull me on Facebook, due to want you think or feel. I will tell you this much I love those boys and Sarah more then you know! You can come to cairns and go fishing. With mum but can't pick up a phone and let me know you are coming down to see them. And you tell me that I don't want to be part of your lives...... You hypocritical b*&! Or hold up when s*&t has HIT the fan in our family what have you DONE!? Since mum and dad got separated you have f*&ing done nothing.... Where were you when it came to stop them fighting, where were you when mum had cancer, where were you when mum was dealing with her burns and treatment, where were YOU when Tanya had to deal with MINE AND YOUR MUM'S BURN BATHS. WHERE WERE YOU WHEN YOU COST ME AND TANYA OUR HOLIDAY WE HAD BOOKED FOR PERTH, the first holiday I booked ever!?!?!? Delete me off face book I don't give a flying f^*ck!!!! Your self centered games have got the better of me!!!! With your ACTIONS I'm done with you I want nothing to do with you from this point on. There is only so MUCH HURT I can deal with on your side. SERIOUSLY. I DONT WANT YOU AT OUR WEDDING!!!!!! I Have checked with the council I do have the right to get you escorted from the area if you do rock up as we have paid for a permit for the area. So this is my final MY FINAL HURRAH to you best of luck in life and wake up to your self you self righteous c^*t!
DS1 - b/f 4 yrs
DS2 - b/f 3yrs 11mths
DS3 - B/F 4yrs 10 mths
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Baby Blue Eyes
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Re: Weddings and family - UPDATED Again

Post by Baby Blue Eyes » Thu Jul 31, 2014 10:21 pm

Peter, I know things were really tough when we were kids with the constant fighting. You know were I was, I was trying to drag you out of the middle of it because there was nothing we could of done as kids to solve their issues. You were always trying to break up the constant fighting. Mum and Dad would be screaming at each other and you were there in the middle screaming and trying to get them to stop but it just made it worse. I would constantly try to drag you away because the fighting would stop quicker but you would never come. There was nothing I could do to protect you from the screaming or stop the fighting so I would go and hide in my room.

In regard to mum with the cancer and you missing your holiday I'm so sorry the timing well and truly sucked but you tell me how I could do it. I had 3 young children and a husband that runs a business doing night shift and he doesn't get sick leave or holiday pay and I live 1 1/2 hours away. I tried to work out a way for me to go down instead of you. I thought that mum would of preferred a woman there but there was just no way I could go down.

In regard to the burns. I came down to Cairns as often as I could and I offered for mum to come and stay with us full time since you and Tanya were working and drive her to Cairns for her appointments but she said NO. I continually offered to drive down and pick her up in between appointments and care for her and then drive her back for the next appointment to give you a break and she continually told me NO.

In regard to not seeing you when we come down you are right I haven't invited you recently but I have told you in the past and sent out many an invite to you to be involved in the kids lives and I either get silence or that you are too busy.

You accuse us of not ever helping the family out. We have helped in every way we can over the last 15 years. We gave yourself and mum free rent for nearly 12 months, we gave you a car, we gave you a motorbike and we have given mum & dad a substantial money over the years to help them out.

This was never about the wedding this was me feeling hurt and rejected over the years from you. Maybe I shouldn't have deleted you from facebook. I have to admit it was a spur of the moment hurt and I wondered if I should have done it, the wedding really just brought it all to the forefront.

In regard to the verbal abuse you have spoken and written to me over the years especially in the last couple of years. I will not have you speak to me this way again.

I will respect your decision to not attend the wedding and there is a small part of me that hopes one day we can move on from this life time of hurts. I do wish you and Tanya all the best for your wedding and that this doesn't mar your special day and I wish you all the happiest that you deserve for your marriage.
DS1 - b/f 4 yrs
DS2 - b/f 3yrs 11mths
DS3 - B/F 4yrs 10 mths
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Baby Blue Eyes
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Re: Weddings and family - UPDATED Again

Post by Baby Blue Eyes » Thu Jul 31, 2014 10:27 pm

Will get this thread deleted soon
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PellyintheWilderness
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Re: Weddings and family - final update and

Post by PellyintheWilderness » Fri Aug 01, 2014 3:19 am

Oh. My. :shock:
I don't know what to say, but I'm so sorry you're having to deal with this.
I think your behaviour is a model of patience and understanding.
Hugs.
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Vahvempi
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Re: Weddings and family - final update and

Post by Vahvempi » Fri Aug 01, 2014 6:31 am

Holy mother.......

bl00dy hell BBE!!!

you should not have to deal with that!!!

sending so many hugs and lots of love.

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Baby Blue Eyes
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Re: Weddings and family - final update and

Post by Baby Blue Eyes » Fri Aug 01, 2014 6:53 am

His response was far more personally and hurtful bringing up stuff like he his glad I will never know my real father. You know to a certain extant some of his anger is right we did do things wrong a couple of years ago with timing but we were very much hurting. My mum had showed me that she lied often and I felt I couldn't trust her any more. He had gone off like this towards me and no matter how many times we tried to help out everyone in an awful situation we kept having our hand bitten so we gave up and yes he had to do it all. He sees that I just gave up and let him sort it out and that is what happened I agree but it wasn't from us not trying to help but rather not being allowed to help. The problem is my mum and our childhood has had a lot to do with all our issues plus him being volatile and me having foot in mouth issues.

I have my issues and he has is. I'm not a perfect person far from it and I know that. I know my failings.

I'm actually very grateful that all this has happened. It has made me realise that I have to attend to my childhood issues instead of just saying it happen and move on because it has affected me in the wall that I have built walls that keep everyone out that I love even my kids. So I have decided to not live in a prison anymore and for the 1st time yesterday I could say I had a glimmer of what it means to enjoy my kids. I'm going to feel more even if it hurts, smile more and laugh more.
DS1 - b/f 4 yrs
DS2 - b/f 3yrs 11mths
DS3 - B/F 4yrs 10 mths
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