Have you seen my hope?

Stressed….depressed or just feeling emotionally isolated and in need of a chat? Sometimes the labels don’t fit but the emotional baggage we carry is the same…….if your life isn’t all beautiful like the nappy ads would have us believe, feel free to have a chat here. It’s important to have somewhere safe where you can be yourself and talk about the things that REALLY matter.


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millimum
Posts: 114
Joined: Tue Mar 05, 2013 11:11 am

Have you seen my hope?

Post by millimum » Tue May 07, 2013 3:36 am

I've recently been diagnosed with PND. History of depression, and had been watching for signs so I shouldn't have been surprised, but I was. After spending a week or so feeling terrible as the diagnosis sunk in, I was starting to feel quite optimistic. Had been back in to see my therapist, and was positive that things were going to get better.

Fast forward to last night. DD took forever to get to sleep (4 1/2 hours, instead of a 45 min feeding session). She's just turned 16 weeks. Normally I'm pretty good at looking for the positive and hanging onto it for dear life, but today it's eluding me.
My brain is telling me it's the 4 month monsters, and that it's all downhill for the next month or so. I was resentful when DD woke up for a feed at 4am and was wide awake smiling at me. I'm feeding her now, and psyching myself expecting that she won't go back to sleep.

I know I need to stop expecting the worst, and to embrace the little happy moments as they happen. Just right now I've forgotten how to do that.

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JMc
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Location: Northern California

Post by JMc » Tue May 07, 2013 3:50 am

Hugs. The uncertainty of how things are going to go day to day is one of the hardest parts of parenting for me in those early days.

Hope she is back to sleep now!

Any chance you might get a rest during the day? And maybe a feel good 'treat' for you (chocolate, coffee out somewhere, a walk with a friend)?

I'm glad to hear you are getting help. I would love to give you encouragement, but can't seem to find the words without sounding gilb or patronizing! But I hope things improve quickly and that you manage better than you think you will!
DD - November 2009 (Breastfed 19 months)
DS1 - August 2011 (Breastfed 2 years and 8 months)
DS2 - November 2014 (Breastfeeding happily)

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Esther
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Location: The better side of the river ;)

Post by Esther » Tue May 07, 2013 5:16 pm

Hugs. Children are stressful, and PND certainly doesn't help any of it. Uppity Science Chick (Dr Kathleen Kendall-Tackett) is a good site with some suggestions that might be useful for you.

Please keep talking to us if it helps - I've been there, and it was hell.
Esther
DD1 05, DS 08, BB 11, DD2 12
Storked by nat*4
Storked Ellie's Mum, foggylog, jessiemay, Ducks & nat*4

millimum
Posts: 114
Joined: Tue Mar 05, 2013 11:11 am

Post by millimum » Tue May 07, 2013 6:16 pm

Thanks guys, for listening and understanding.

Today went much better than last night. Got her to have a nap in the carrier, and I even had a 15 min nap while I was feeding her in bed this afternoon!
Getting some of my confidence back, and realising that even when it's pear shaped, I do have *some* parenting skills. It will still be hard, but I can do this.

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marie7
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Location: Adelaide

Post by marie7 » Tue May 07, 2013 7:07 pm

Hugs!! And yes, you can do it!
DS APRIL 09 BF 2YRS DS2 FEB 12 BF
Number 3 on its way due 18 may!!
Fellare is storking me!! :)

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Penguin
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Post by Penguin » Tue May 07, 2013 8:10 pm

Hugs from me xx
DD1 May 2011
Super baby Dec 2013
DD2 Feb 2015 Storked by Parla.
Proud storker: michansam's DS3, katsbi's DD3 and Gwen's mum's DS
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Esther
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Joined: Mon Aug 04, 2008 8:10 pm
Location: The better side of the river ;)

Post by Esther » Wed May 08, 2013 11:55 am

You care about doing the right thing by your child. That makes you a great parent. Doesn't matter if it's not what everyone else does. If you're happy (enough!) and she's happy, that's all that counts. oh, possibly your partner :wink:
Esther
DD1 05, DS 08, BB 11, DD2 12
Storked by nat*4
Storked Ellie's Mum, foggylog, jessiemay, Ducks & nat*4

Karen81
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Post by Karen81 » Mon May 13, 2013 1:44 pm

JMc wrote:Hugs. The uncertainty of how things are going to go day to day is one of the hardest parts of parenting for me in those early days.
Me too. That unknown was very hard for me too.

Huge hugs from me.

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strolltotheshops
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Location: NSW

Post by strolltotheshops » Tue May 14, 2013 3:01 am

Hugs.

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