Hand written letters

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AussieBritLu
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Hand written letters

Post by AussieBritLu » Thu Nov 17, 2016 6:29 pm

What are your thoughts on them?
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freerange
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Re: Hand written letters

Post by freerange » Thu Nov 17, 2016 7:35 pm

I think they're great!
Unless its some passive-agressive "I shat on your car because it was in the wrong parking spot" kind of letter. Those sort of hand written letters are not nice.

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AussieBritLu
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Re: Hand written letters

Post by AussieBritLu » Thu Nov 17, 2016 8:40 pm

That is true.

So do you think that hand written letters are impersonal?
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Mummy woo!
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Re: Hand written letters

Post by Mummy woo! » Fri Nov 18, 2016 6:23 am

AussieBritLu wrote:That is true.

So do you think that hand written letters are impersonal?
Unless they are an anonymous hate-note, I can't imagine how they could be impersonal. Has someone said something to you?
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Esther
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Re: Hand written letters

Post by Esther » Fri Nov 18, 2016 9:19 am

What MW said/asked.

I sometimes find it quicker/easier to write a note to teacher. I certainly prefer to write my own thank you notes, or condolences.

I really should buy myself some decent notepaper, rather than a sheet of printer paper each time :?
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AussieBritLu
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Re: Hand written letters

Post by AussieBritLu » Fri Nov 18, 2016 9:37 am

I wrote a letter to sil to try and sort out whatever it is that's going on between us because I can't talk to her about it because in the past year every time I've talked to her she has ignored and not acknowledged me.....my mil passed the letter on to bil who told her that sil doesn't like letters as she thinks they are impersonal and I have to make the effort to talk to her. This upset me as it took a lot for me to even write the letter in the first place and it makes me feel that I am the one who has to make all the effort.

She is pregnant and due in April....just after dd2's first birthday and I want to sort things out because I'd like for the cousins to grow up together as my three don't really have anyone else other than fil and mil with my family all being in the uk. But i am not ready or willing to make the effort to talk to her in person because of how she has made me feel in the past when I've tried to talk to her. And I'm not taking the fact she's pregnant as an excuse either because she's having a relatively easy pregnancy and whilst I was pregnant with dd2 she had no qualms in making my life hell and making me feel unwanted and unwelcome at family gatherings ... making me sit on the floor etc....
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JennyD
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Re: Hand written letters

Post by JennyD » Fri Nov 18, 2016 2:05 pm

Sounds like she's just being difficult. you can't get more personal than a hand written letter.. Only way to be closer is face to face or on the phone. Also she needs to make an effort to talk to you. That said, I rarely talk to my SILs :) I talk to my brothers often, and to BIL (DHs brother) occasionally, but not so much ILs, we do quite enjoy each other's company, but we don't go out of our way, because they aren't my actual siblings :) So in this case, I would say it is DHs problem not yours, as it is his family. He needs to chat to his brother or sister (however, the relationship works) and his mother and sort it out.

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Re: Hand written letters

Post by freerange » Fri Nov 18, 2016 7:11 pm

AussieBritLu wrote:That is true.

So do you think that hand written letters are impersonal?
I think letters are lovely! But I think your SIL is the one being passive-aggressive. You could ask for the letter back and read it out to her, but seriously, it sounds like she wont come to the party no matter what you do.

Like JennyD said - you've done your bit now your DH needs to step in.

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Re: Hand written letters

Post by Nedsmum » Fri Nov 18, 2016 7:41 pm

And your BIL is probably 'gatekeeping' - why didn't the letter just go directly to your SIL ? Why through MIL and BIL ???
Agreed with above - you've done your bit - I think we have a general forum 'concensus' that the spouse needs to handle the 'blood' relatives when it fails between the in-laws!
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AussieBritLu
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Re: Hand written letters

Post by AussieBritLu » Fri Nov 18, 2016 8:35 pm

I passed it on to mil to pass on as I wasn't going to be in town for several days. DH has been trying to sort it out too.
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