Won't eat for DH

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Won't eat for DH

Postby bubbychoochoo » Sun Jan 06, 2013 12:42 am

I have recently returned to work & I am away in the evening for DD's dinner. She refuses solids from DH & has never been good with a bottle. She waits up till I get home @ 9.30 & as soon as I walk in she does not want anything to do with DH. She will let me feed her solids then, followed by lots of boobie, lots of crawling all over me, & finally settling about 11pm! Poor DH is exhausted as DD refuses to eat or go to sleep for him & I'm tired as I've just finished work. Any suggestions on encouraging DD to let DH feed her? She is happy enough to wait up but it is a struggle for DH to keep her entertained, & it is a struggle for me to stay up with her till 11!
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Postby 4fun » Sun Jan 06, 2013 6:38 am

How old is your bubs? Would finger food work. My bubs went through a stage of not wanting others to feed her (even me) but loves feeding herself pasta, steamed veg, strips of meat scrambled egg, toast, cubes of avocado, soft fruit etc. she is still not a fan of others feeding her a bowl of food, she'll let me sometimes but she is fine to have a few pieces put on the high chair try and be supervised munching away then add a few more.
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Postby bubbychoochoo » Sun Jan 06, 2013 7:30 am

She is 7mth. Sometimes I will do that, she loves it, but DH really doesn't like it, he is terrified she will choke. I've tried to reassure him but it's just a fear he has, so I don't push it. I mean I still check DD at least twice a night to make sure she's breathing lol, he thinks I'm crazy but it's just a fear I have :)
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Postby marie7 » Sun Jan 06, 2013 9:01 am

I was going to suggest finger food also... Maybe he could sit with you while you offer finger foods for a few times? To help reassure him? Other than that I think your dh is doing a great job to keep her entertained until you get home. I think sometimes bubs just need time to adjust to a new way and a new routine of doing things, just give her time, I'm sure she will eat and drink for your dh soon!! As hard as it is just reassure him to keep offering food and milk and she will get used to it eventually..... Also maybe try a cup instead of a bottle... My boys have always drank from cups, sippy cups and straw cups for milk and water, a bottle never worked here either. In the mean time hard for you when you get home of course but won't be forever. :wink:
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Postby JMc » Sun Jan 06, 2013 9:09 am

Have you checked out baby led solids (sometimes called baby led weaning) at all? I discovered that babies are actually more likely to choke when they are being spoon fed. Gagging is different to choking. Gagging will actually stop a child from choking because it stops the food from getting far enough down for the child to choke. If babies feed themselves they will often gag, but gradually get better at swallowing. Whereas, if they are being spoon fed purées the food can slip down and choke them. Not trying to scare you, just thought it might put your dh's mind at rest if he knew it is actually safer for babies to feed themselves (obviously not hard foods like raw nuts and carrots).
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Postby AbbeyCat » Sun Jan 06, 2013 11:24 am

Do any of your local group have the baby-led weaning DVD in their library? It's fairly short, but shows lots of kids eating "real" food.

My mum + dad will be minding DD 2 days a week for about 6 weeks. Mum is very nervous about the solids feeding. Thinking I should get the DVD out for her to watch.
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Postby marie7 » Sun Jan 06, 2013 11:34 am

Everyone I knew was nervous when I gave ds2 'normal' food from 6 mths... And when he gagged in front of people I didn't flinch, they were ready for the CPR performance.... Haha but I've slowly turned people... A DVD would have been good for my mum though! Damn! She now happily gives ds2 what were eating!
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Postby fellare » Sun Jan 06, 2013 1:30 pm

yeah, get dh to look up BLW, there is a great forum and I found it helpful to watch videos of it to see what to expect, gagging wise. You could always start with some soft fruit pieces, or bread. pretty hard to choke on them anyway. when solids were routinely introduced at 4 months, all babies were started on finger foods by 6 months! there is no reason to wait longer than that anyway.

if you really don't want to yet, you can also let your LO self feed mushes. DS loves eating hummus with his fingers. It's messy, but if you do it outside and have a bath ready (baby bath outside if LO can sit up, with some toys, gives also great entertainment and some time to sit around with a hot drink for dad, he'll appreciate the rest, Iḿ sure) it's far from bad.

DH also finds it hard to get my lo to sleep. only surefire way is to put him in the ergo and walk around. Yes, that means he did 2 40min walks a day, often in the living room, while reading a book!
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Postby bubbychoochoo » Mon Jan 07, 2013 9:41 am

Thanks for all the replies :D
We have done a little BLW before, but DH gets so stressed when DD gags, he can't handle it :(
I tried again yesterday, with some capsicum as DD loves it. Well she had a ball for about half an hour & DH seemed more relaxed...then she gagged on a little piece & poor DH flipped out & said never again. *sigh*
Hopefully once I show him some BLW videos he will calm down... :?
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